My heads in turmoil - How do you make big decisions?

[fusionlad]

How have you all coped with making life changing decisions? I think it's time for me to move on, but I normally need a good kick up the backside to make big decisions.

The thing is, I have lived in Plymouth just about all my life. My family and friends are here, and it really does feel like home.

However, I'm working in a call centre, with not great prospects, and things just feel so boring. If you know the south west, you'll know there aren't exactly many job opportunities down here. I have some good friends, but no real close friends.

Through my ex-boyfriend, I have some very good friends who live in Swansea. They have a nice house, with good jobs. I know Swansea isn't exactly the most happening place in the UK, but it's a change of scene, so to speak.

Basically, they would like me to move up there. They'll let me have a bedroom in their house until I find a place of my own. They're also helping me on the job front.

But to me, it all seems too scary. I live on my own, with a nice flat, a pretty secure job, but nothing really happens in my life. I love visiting my friends in different towns around the country, but whether I'd enjoy moving somewhere permantly I just don't know.

There is also a love interest in South Wales, but I'm not going to base my decision around them, as things don't always work out, and it's very early days anyway. All this talk happened before he appeared on the scene.

Anyway... has anyone got any advice, apart from making my posts shorter? Should I just go for it?

Speak to you soon

[marksi]

I know the feeling. And last year I moved to London for 6 months to see if it was better. It wasn't. I missed (in particular) having my own space in my own house as well as my friends here in NI, even though I have loads of friends in London too. The grass isn't always greener.

[cat]

If it all goes wrong, you can always move back.

The fact that you are thinking that there might be something wrong with things as they are, really should tell you that there actually is.

[Jamez]

Swansea isn't bad! It's in the middle of a massive regeneration like Cardiff has had (with the Bay, Millennium Stadium etc.)

Swansea is quite good in that it's the halfway point between the fantastic Pembrokeshire national park and the bright lights of Cardiff!

[This and That]

It's a tough one but on the positive you have age on your side your very lucky in that respect.Most of us get caught up in not bad jobs with a mortage and then your nearly forty before you know it and not stuck but you have to be careful about moving from one fire to another.

Workwise what would you realy like to do?.You don't seem that bothered about working in a Call Centre.If i were you i would try and aim for a career that is going to make you a happy something that you realy want to do.

No disrespect to anyone who lives in Swansea but it doesn't strike me as a happening place.Why not stick your current situation out a little longer and try and save up some money and figure out what you want always a good idea to have a bit saved up .If i were you i would head out to OZ for a gap year and see how you get on it's fab especially for gays .You'll meet plenty mates along the way .

I have been all over the world with my job and i class myself as being lucky it's well paid too,but i'm not happy in it, the grass isn't always greener.

But if your going to do something else travel further than Swansea .

[fusionlad]

If it all goes wrong, you can always move back.

The fact that you are thinking that there might be something wrong with things as they are, really should tell you that there actually is.

Yea I guess. I think a change of scenery is what I need, especially with the bad time I had at the start of the year.

[TVDragon]

Through my ex-boyfriend, I have some very good friends who live in Swansea. They have a nice house, with good jobs. I know Swansea isn't exactly the most happening place in the UK, but it's a change of scene, so to speak.

Well now Swansea is the new Cardiff you know. Ish. Well it's progressed amazingly in the last 5-7 years, it's very reminiscent of Plymouth as I'm sure you're aware [the same man designed both cities iirc]. I've lived in Plymouth and lived in Swansea with people from there, and we all feel the same.

Try to live in the west if you can, the north and east are a bit ropey. Buses being bricked, horses in the road, that sort of affair.

I don't seem to mind moving to live somewhere else, and I have done several times [which always surprises me]. So long as you feel *some* degree of belonging there -- through whatever kind of connection you need that to be. It's not nice being completely an island in an unfamiliar place. But I think you have that, so.

Thing is, you move to Swansea and you'll know one way or another whether it worked. You stay in Plymouth [nice as it is] and you'll always kind of wonder, surely.

[fusionlad]

Swansea isn't bad! It's in the middle of a massive regeneration like Cardiff has had (with the Bay, Millennium Stadium etc.)

Swansea is quite good in that it's the halfway point between the fantastic Pembrokeshire national park and the bright lights of Cardiff!

Yea, there's lots going on in Swansea right now. And from what I've seen of Cardiff it looks great. And if I do get homesick, it's not that long drive down the M4 and M5.

[fusionlad]

Why not stick your current situation out a little longer and try and save up some money and figure out what you want always a good idea to have a bit saved up

Because if I just stay where I am, I'll do just that. I've been trying to figure out what I really want for years.

[fusionlad]

Thing is, you move to Swansea and you'll know one way or another whether it worked. You stay in Plymouth [nice as it is] and you'll always kind of wonder, surely.

A few people have said that...

I think I'm talking myself into biting the bullet.

[Jamez]

I thought that moving away from home was going to he really difficult. I moved 100 miles away to an area I didn't know, and no one I knew!

I've been here 11 months now, and I love it! The best thing I ever did was move away. I could have come here and been a right stroppy bastard and not bothered making new friends and just sitting in my room wishing to be home.

But when I realised the opportunites for making my own fun here were abundant, I leaped straight in and I'm having the best time of my life. I don't love University, but all the bonuses that go with it such as living in a house with 3 other people your own age and having a bloody good time is fantastic. Plus, people round here seem to fancy the pants off me. It must be the charisma and charm that does it!


I think moving away will be the best thing you did.

However, Cardiff would be more your thing though, Fusionlad! Swansea will always be Cardiff's poorer and dirtier little brother!