Metropol

Yes? No? Maybe?

I hope you find the poisoned kee-bab.

Well in the end I decided against it and ate half a loaf of Turkish bread and a packet of fairtrade dried fruit.

Thanks to everyone who PMed me with advice on this difficult decision.

Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum.

Mmm - mechanically reconstituted, grease-soaked, processed meat-effect shite. My mouth's watering at the thought of it.

Seriously why would anyone ever choose to eat a kebab?

Oh I'd LOVE to see a seductive M&S advert for donner meat!

That would be amazing if they could pull off a seductive donner Kebab ad Andy. Something i've never been able to do while munching on one. That may be because i'm pissed when i order a kebab. Nothing about me is seductive when i'm bladdered. I'm good fun when drunk though. Everyone loves drunk Lorna even though there is nothing sexy about drunk Lorna