Metropol

I know this will sound melancholy, and my threads before lately have been upbeat and sarcastic, but I need the advice of the esteemed MP247 crowd.

My bro is going to Bristol to live with his lady. Before he moved in with me just over 2 years ago, he was very shy and wouldn't say 'boo' to a goose. After sixteen months of Marky Mark training (Mark is my real name), he turned into an open, gregarious guy, rivalling me in the shagging stakes. The boy done good! I gave him tough love, and it was love, and he turned into the man he always wanted to be (although I have to admit that even with my help, he did most of it himself). In other words, he turned into the guy I always knew he could be.

He is off in maybe two or three weeks. I am very close to my bro, and love him very much. I am so proud of him and his progress, but I will miss him beyond measure and have been bursting into tears because he is going. I loved him anyway, and my special project, my student, has done better than I would ever have dreamed of.

I am in a state of mourning for him before he's gone. Can anyone console me with words of comfort because I am a bit of an emotional wreck about it at the mo?

Thanks in advance. JB.

PS. On top of that, as mentioned in an earlier thread, chinajan has gone too, and I miss her terribly. She has met a fantastic guy and I am so happy and chuffed for her, but I miss the blonde-haired bint! I am seeing her again on Nov 5, but I am still missing her!

PPS. I am normally a very stable man, but these things have thrown me completely. I am not superstitious, but years ending in an even number have always been quite bad for me in the main, and it is happening again now.

PPPS. Woe is me!

Chin up jb!

I know it's not the same thing at all...but after various troubles with my friends - and after many lost nights down the pub with my brother (as well as working for him!) - we got extremely close.

I don't normally get close to people at all, and myself and my brother have always got on well...but not on the level that we've found in the last couple of months. We'd share a drink and a laugh, soak up the atmosphere and have a jolly good time doing it. We were both there for each other when we needed each other, and that we've certainly done!

Now I'm here in the faceless smoke, with a lot of good people...but I do miss my brother terribly. He brought out a lot of good in me, and gave me some fantastic oppertunities (and still does thankfully!) both socially and career/money wise. He did me a lot of good, and I hope to think that I did a little bit for him too.

It's tough...but we both know we're down the end of a phone if needs must, and that London isn't the other side of the world and we can't get away from each other so easily.

He's coming down to see me in a couple of weeks, and it's going to be fantastic. I really can't wait.


But as I say jb, it's not the same kind of thing...but I guess sometimes we either have to move on or at least accept that others will move on. I think it was slightly easier for me because I was doing the moving on...I never felt like I was losing a world - merely taking on a different one. I suppose in your case, it will simply be that life will be the same but it will be missing something.

Life's a bitch when you think about it isn't it?

If you're ever in the smoke, remind me to buy you a £3.00 pint jb!

johnnyboy wrote:I know this will sound melancholy, and my threads before lately have been upbeat and sarcastic, but I need the advice of the esteemed MP247 crowd.

My bro is going to Bristol to live with his lady. Before he moved in with me just over 2 years ago, he was very shy and wouldn't say 'boo' to a goose. After sixteen months of Marky Mark training (Mark is my real name), he turned into an open, gregarious guy, rivalling me in the shagging stakes. The boy done good! I gave him tough love, and it was love, and he turned into the man he always wanted to be (although I have to admit that even with my help, he did most of it himself). In other words, he turned into the guy I always knew he could be.

He is off in maybe two or three weeks. I am very close to my bro, and love him very much. I am so proud of him and his progress, but I will miss him beyond measure and have been bursting into tears because he is going. I loved him anyway, and my special project, my student, has done better than I would ever have dreamed of.

I am in a state of mourning for him before he's gone. Can anyone console me with words of comfort because I am a bit of an emotional wreck about it at the mo?

Thanks in advance. JB.

PS. On top of that, as mentioned in an earlier thread, chinajan has gone too, and I miss her terribly. She has met a fantastic guy and I am so happy and chuffed for her, but I miss the blonde-haired bint! I am seeing her again on Nov 5, but I am still missing her!

PPS. I am normally a very stable man, but these things have thrown me completely. I am not superstitious, but years ending in an even number have always been quite bad for me in the main, and it is happening again now.

PPPS. Woe is me!

Hmmm...strange you should say that about years with even numbers.

2001: Brilliant year
2002: Crap - I got fired from no less than 3 jobs
2003: Brilliant - loads of girlfriends, loads of new peoplw...
2004: Crap - Crashed my car, screwed around by girls, fell into a job I hate etc.
2005: I have high expectations!

If you're heading to Bristol, JB, nip over to Cardiff for a few pints with me!

Isonstine wrote:Chin up jb!

I know it's not the same thing at all...but after various troubles with my friends - and after many lost nights down the pub with my brother (as well as working for him!) - we got extremely close.

I don't normally get close to people at all, and myself and my brother have always got on well...but not on the level that we've found in the last couple of months. We'd share a drink and a laugh, soak up the atmosphere and have a jolly good time doing it. We were both there for each other when we needed each other, and that we've certainly done!

It's wierd, but when siblings need to pull together and form a united front, they often do. I like you a lot anyway, Ison, as you know, but the fact your bro came through for you when you needed him and he needed you is fantastic.

One of my best mates is an only child, and he doesn't really understand why I feel this way, but he sort of knows it in his mind, not in his gut. I suspect you know what I mean with that statement.

Isonstine wrote:Now I'm here in the faceless smoke, with a lot of good people...but I do miss my brother terribly. He brought out a lot of good in me, and gave me some fantastic oppertunities (and still does thankfully!) both socially and career/money wise. He did me a lot of good, and I hope to think that I did a little bit for him too.

My bro and I always loved and liked each other, but it entered a totally different level when he moved in with me. I definitely did a lot of good for him, but seeing his growth and development, he did a lot for me too. I feel proud of him, and proud of the belief and confidence I was able to breed in my younger bro, the great guy that he is and always was. He just needed to be shown how much I and my friends liked him, and after years of self-doubt, he accepted the fact that he was universally liked. Not because he was a joker, but for the honest, sincere and fun guy he was. When he accepted others saw him that way, I knew my job was done!

Isonstine wrote:But as I say jb, it's not the same kind of thing...but I guess sometimes we either have to move on or at least accept that others will move on. I think it was slightly easier for me because I was doing the moving on...I never felt like I was losing a world - merely taking on a different one. I suppose in your case, it will simply be that life will be the same but it will be missing something.

Life's a bitch when you think about it isn't it?

If you're ever in the smoke, remind me to buy you a £3.00 pint jb!

I think one of the main hurts is that my bro is moving on from me, and not the other way around. There is a little jealousy that he has got where he wants to be and I have not. But that only forms a small part of it - I am so chuffed he has fallen in love with someone, but, because I have seen him nearly every day for the last 2+ years, despite all his progress socially, I will just miss the guy, because he is a star is every way, socially, comedically, and emotionally. He is everything you could want in a friend and more, and I will miss him. The fact he is my little bro just makes it hurt like you wouldn't believe.

The very fact I am posting this at 3 in the morning shows I just can't sleep because of it. Major insomiac attack!!!

When I am next in the big smoke, you WILL buy me a drink, my fellow Ison! Thanks for your wise words - I really do appreciate them.

Jamez wrote:Hmmm...strange you should say that about years with even numbers.

2001: Brilliant year
2002: Crap - I got fired from no less than 3 jobs
2003: Brilliant - loads of girlfriends, loads of new peoplw...
2004: Crap - Crashed my car, screwed around by girls, fell into a job I hate etc.
2005: I have high expectations!

If you're heading to Bristol, JB, nip over to Cardiff for a few pints with me!

It is wierd stuff, Jamez....

2000: Nearly went bankrupt and moved out from long-term GF
2001: Leased a city centre office and moved from major debit to major credit with the bank.
2002: Katie, my gorgeous sexy gf of 8 years dumped me, fucked up with a girl who should've been my wife. Business remained static for the whole year.
2003: Cemented friendship with Jan properly, shagged more lasses in one year than the average man does in a lifetime, business rocketed, put down a deposit on a flat, etc.
2004: Business plummeted, had loads of debt to pay off, very little girlfriend action compared to 2003, brother moving to Bristol (hundreds of miles away from Newcastle).
2005: Fingers crossed.

And if you are ever in Newcastle, let me know beforehand and a few pints could be in order, Jamez!

I hope your brother has a safe and happy move to Bristol JB, sorry if that sounds a bit flippant, but if you're help to develop his character and confidence over the past few years, it will no doubt help him settle in a lot quicker and hopefully rule out any chance of him feeling unhappy.

From personal experience, moving to a new area where you hardly know anyone can be a daunting thought, but after three months living in England with a new job that I enjoy doing and I'm making excellent progress in, I've made lots of new friends both through work and social life, found my own flat and I feel more confident and content than I've ever felt in a long time. My family and my friends have been a fantastic support before, during, and since I moved, and I really couldn't have taken the step without them backing me all the way.

My advice is - don't worry too much about first impressions or feeling you are a stranger in a new town, it takes time for people to accept you and get used to you, give it time, don't try to show your nerves on the outside, don't take yourself too seriously and rise above any harshness or ridicule - and pretty soon, you'll be part of the furniture!

Hi everyone. I'm a newbie here so... hi!

Anyway... just a little off topic, but is it just brother/brother and sister/sister relationships that are close? Everyone I know is close to a sibling of the same sex, but not close to a sibling of the opposite sex. Anyone else find the same thing?

I work in terms of adcademic years...

1999-2000 Good year
2000-2001 Bad year
2001-2002 Good year
2002-2003 Bad year
2003-2004 Indifferent Year
2004-2005 Hmm... reasonably good so far, could go either way!