Metropol

Let me set the seen of you. The entirity of my town (quite a large one) has decended upon this particular club to bid fairwell to everyone before we all move on to University.

There is a dance floor. And raised next to it, seperated by railings, is an area for people to sit and enjoy their drink. I was doing this until a rather marvelous tune, which subsequently I have forgotten, came on. After hearing this wonderous noise, I jumped over the railings on to the dance floor, and continued by following a James Martin-esque dance manourver.

No more had I moved my pelvis that two large men grab me by my arms and politely me ask me to "fuck off out of here". I politely suggest, thinking that this was a consequence from jumping the low railings, that I should get my bag. Relucantly they agree.

I went back round, the correct way, to the other side of the railings where my bag was placed. I retrieved it, and began saying farewell to my peers, who I shall not see for some time.

While doing this I was very rudely interupted by my arm being twisted behind my back and being asked to "get a fucking move on". Naturally I told em to "FUCK OFF!! I'm saying good bye to my mates! I think that's the least you can manage, Gentlemen?"

Being the fanny's they were, they got two more men to drag me, shouting a few profanities, and not leaving without a struggle, down the stairs and outside of the club. (I later received many an SMS congratulating for leaving without a rather titilating struggle).

Standing in the entrance to the club, the staircase leading up to the main area, I very politely (honesty) asked who "that bloke who lobbed me down the stairs" was. I was told they weren't allowed to give names.

I then asked "well what's your name them"? He said "I thought I told you to fuck off". Considering all I had done was manouver myself over a low railing to the dance floor, I replied (maybe not so tactfully), "well I'll simply ask for the ugly c**t wearing the Smokey Joe's uniform?".

No sooner had I said this that two police officers grabbed me, arrested me for "a breach of the piece" and whisked my away to the local police station.

After giving a short statement, and laughing mildly, amused at the fact that they could be arresting crack dealers on the street corner (I told them this naturally), they released me due to "lack of evidence" half an hour later. Basically, they could not be fucked, and rightly so.

The saga began at 0010, and I was home, thanks to a lift from a very nice officer, at 0120. What a complete waste of everybody's time, over such a very trivial incident.

Curious after encountering this, I was wondering, have any other forumers been arrested in their time, and over such trivial (if you concider this trivial) reasons as I have.

Another day in the life of Row. It was a nice little night out then?

I don't think I've ever been arrested... It would probably be something I'd remember anyway. But if I was a copper and I ever saw you dancing, I think I'd have to arrest you too.

Row, That seems like a fairly regular type of situation, but I feel sorry for you for having to be subject to it.

I'm sure that it is generally the best policy just to do as they say, but it can be such a drag being obedient to a load of dumb ass mother fookers, like that.

At least you got an anecdote out of it.

My Uncle was arrested on suspicion of carrying out the IRA Guildford bombings.

If memory serves me right, DAS also has a story linked to this event. Your parents, good sir (??)

And all bouncers are twats. It is what they are paid to do.

Was it the story involving my parents, Buckingham Palace and an armed guard? I certainly have vague memories of this coming up months and months ago...?

Row... I think the jumping over the railings may not have caused the problem. I believe the lack of trousers may have caused it.

DAS wrote:Was it the story involving my parents, Buckingham Palace and an armed guard? I certainly have vague memories of this coming up months and months ago...?

I don't remember now.

But it was interesting at the time, if you can take solace from that.

I was wrongfully arrested back in 1998. Basically, I was on to my way to the station when I released I'd forgotten my ticket to get a third off travel. So, I started to run back home (about 10 mins away) in order to get said ticket. I noticed a police van parked outside Oddbins and naturally wondered what was going on. Some reprebate stealing no doubt I thought. Five minutes later I was in the back of the van having been arrested for "stealing the charity tin from the till" of Oddbins. I protested, said I was on my way back home to get my ticket. They said I'd been seen on CCTV. I also explained my heart condition saying that the whole situation was giving me palapations (which as you can imagine it was) They began to twig they had the wrong man when on their way to the police station (about 20 miles from the scene of the crime!) when they asked me if I was on drugs. I responded 'yes' for my heart condition which they were making worse by the minute. What did I do for a living? I told the truth. I was on a library studies degree course. Realising the perpetrator was not me, they got me to the station to fill out some forms while they nabbed the real bloke who walked in to the station as I was leaving. He was dressed in a dark grey and black coat. Rather like me. He was about 5 and a half foot tall. Rather like me. He had brown short but slightly touseled hair. Rather like me...
They drove me home and wanted to explain to my mother exactly what had happened and offer their apologies for the shock I'd been put through.