Metropol

Although I've personally never worked in retail, I have friends who have many a time have expierienced people like this. Including a woman who instisted she'd bought a Safeway branded item from a Sainsbury's store and wanted her money back, even when it was pointed out she wasn't convinced. Eevn me working in an office you still get twats on the phone who have absolutely no brains what so ever and no matter how many times you explain something they still cant grasp it.

There was also a time when I needed some information from a company and I got passed between the same two people a number of times, without them realising, each one sure that the other would be able to deal with my request and they couldn't.

Worthy addition to this thread, this. My mother works in retail and I've given her the following list and it all rings true to her:

http://www.hein.co.uk/features/cashier/index.shtml

Neil Jones wrote:Worthy addition to this thread, this. My mother works in retail and I've given her the following list and it all rings true to her:

http://www.hein.co.uk/features/cashier/index.shtml

hehehe that list couldn't be more true!

altho they failed to mention
- c*nts who HAVE to pull apart EVERY evening mail on the pile as they read the back page or desperately search for a *late edition* :roll:

- the same ilk who come in on a sunday and try and steal the free CDs from the papers.

- saddos waiting outside at 9.30am on a sunday for the shop to open at 10.00 ... these are not night shift workers after some milk, just old tw*ts with nothing better to do.

- people asking "is it a roll over?" "how many people won on saturday" - how would i friggin know? i do not care, i operate the machine, i am not camelot - i do not play the lottery.

- "ill have £5 on the gas, £10 MEB, £10 phone top up and a lucky dip" - meanwhile the queue doubles in length, *radical idea* why cant people pay bills like any other normal person - using a bank account.

- people who pay for things with coppers, who are then affronted when you proceed to count them all in-front of them (preferably whilst holding onto the item they have bought) - cos if im gonna waste time counting your shite - YOU are going to watch me.

- smokers who still get confused at the difference between kingsize and superkings :roll: i am a non smoker and it is plainly obvious that superkings are slightly bigger. "i asked for kingsize!", "ummm, these are kingsize" "no theyre not", "oh... you confused me" (yeh, i really should stop confusing people with these technical terms)

- idiots who try to jump the queue, trying to push 35p in your hand or leaving it on the counter saying "i only want a paper". good-o, then you can wait in line like everyone else, i am paid the wages of 1 person, so i shall serve 1 customer at a time.

working in a supermarket is certainly an experience, and as much as you end up loathing every customer (even the sweetest of old ladies is bound to irritate you in someway), if you work at the right store, then your co-workers can make up for the poorness of customers.

ive worked at several places, doing several different types of jobs, and i haven't laughed as much in any other job.

Boy 2 "Ah forget it I've got ID" He shows me his provisional driving licence (obviously over 16).
Me "Right, but I still can't serve you as one of you doesn't have proof of age. I can't serve someone who will supply to someone under age"

I'm not defending the little arsehole, but when I held a provisional licence I did get a bit annoyed myself about shops who refused to take it as ID.

I don't know whether the 16 year old moped riding brigade have a different licence, but a provisional photocard car licence is perfectly legitimate ID - the only difference in apperance between the two is that the provisional photocard is coloured green instead of pink and has a learner sign where the European flag is on a full licence. It still has a date of birth printed on it, it's still issued by the DVLA and thus still has all the copy protection that comes with a full licence.

There really is no valid reason for anywhere refusing to take it as ID, but many places do.

cwathen wrote:

Boy 2 "Ah forget it I've got ID" He shows me his provisional driving licence (obviously over 16).
Me "Right, but I still can't serve you as one of you doesn't have proof of age. I can't serve someone who will supply to someone under age"

I'm not defending the little arsehole, but when I held a provisional licence I did get a bit annoyed myself about shops who refused to take it as ID.

I don't know whether the 16 year old moped riding brigade have a different licence, but a provisional photocard car licence is perfectly legitimate ID - the only difference in apperance between the two is that the provisional photocard is coloured green instead of pink and has a learner sign where the European flag is on a full licence. It still has a date of birth printed on it, it's still issued by the DVLA and thus still has all the copy protection that comes with a full licence.

There really is no valid reason for anywhere refusing to take it as ID, but many places do.

The only reason it was refused was because he was quite possibly going to supply them to his friend under 16.

My best awkward customer story revolves around a 50-ish year old bloke, scruffy but not too bad for a DIY store. He asked me to mix some paint on the dulux paint mixing machine, he pointed to the colour on the tin and says “that red”, I manage to just avoid laughing. I try to point out that we can’t mix that colour, maybe something similar but not that one. He doesn’t seam to grasp the concept of design. Eventually I managed to persuade him that I couldn’t mix it and I tried to show him the bank of possible colours with the response “none of those are red”. I then got a colour chart out and found two colours which were very similar, but they weren’t glossy on the chart, I tried to explain that they could be mixed in any finnish, and were just displayed in matt. After a while he then decided that he would like “signal red” from the heritage range, which is a specific set of complementary colours, with their own colour charts, stored to the right of the main choices. He tried several times to get a colour card out, despite me saying the only copy in the store was screwed in place. Eventually he got the message. He then wanted a small gloss. I showed him the 500ml, oh no he doesn’t need that much, only 250ml, argh. I pointed out that the 250ml pots are testers, and only matt emulsion, continued to argue for a while, he started to get animated. I went to get my store manager, I was quite enjoying it, but the risk of violence and him asking for the store manager, I thought it was best to give in. He came back and just talked loudly at him. The guy went on “Why have them on show if you can’t mix them?” to which I replied, as I did to quite a few of the questions, “well, that is an EMULSION, not a GLOSS”. He then ended up saying “well if you can’t mix it what is the point in having the machine?” I really was tempted to punch or laugh at him, at that point. We then showed him other glosses and enamels, but of course none were what he wanted.

Some customers you are nice to and give top quality service to, but those that are awkward get the bare minimum.

At Tesco we only accept pink photocard Driving Licences, Portman "Prove It" cards, and UK Passports. Any other type of ID is not valid, simply because it can be so easily faked, prime example being that website.

The point I was making is that Provisional photocard licences are JUST as secure as full licences - because they are exactly the same thing, just a different colour and with a learner sign on them! This belief that the temporary nature of their status makes them unacceptable as positive identification is completely unfounded.

I can fully understand people not taking NUS and local authority proof of age cards etc because there are so many variants around that it's hard to know which are genuine and which are made up, and as you say they can be faked easily, so even a genuine scheme could well have counterfeit cards.

But any establishment which accepts a full photocard driving licence as ID has no reason on earth not to accept a provisional one too - they *both* have identical levels of security and so are *both* just as hard to fake. And if anyone *could* fake one, why on earth would they make a provisional one when a full one would require no more effort?

tvmercia wrote:- people asking "is it a roll over?" "how many people won on saturday" - how would i friggin know? i do not care, i operate the machine, i am not camelot - i do not play the lottery.

The Lottery Machine can easily tell you if it's a Rollover and how many people won in the last draw.

idiots who try to jump the queue, trying to push 35p in your hand or leaving it on the counter saying "i only want a paper". good-o, then you can wait in line like everyone else, i am paid the wages of 1 person, so i shall serve 1 customer at a time.

I know what you mean with that one - it certainly is annoying! Although sometimes I can see where they're coming from, when the 80+ customer in front of them is taking an age to count all of the coppers again and again, constantly asking how much they've already given and how much the items cost altogether.

I worked for Superdrug for 5 years as a Saturday assistant and although I never experienced customers like the first example, there are numerous examples of 'annoying' customers.

The customer places three items on the till and says "Just these please." Well, obviously. The numbers of times I was tempted to say: "What, not the other six items next to them?" when there were clearly three items on the till.

"Have you got a bag at all?" I've got sodding hundreds... Clearly on view at the end of the till.

Money quips that the customer thinks I haven't before if I held a note to the light... "Careful! The ink's still wet!" or "I've just printed it myself!" or worse, both sayings at the same time!

"Do you want the odd?" meaning 'can I give you more than you ask for so I get a nice rounded number in change which will make life easier for you'...
No it didn't. I'm very bad with any adding in my head and anything that wasn't what it said on the till display would throw me!

On the receipt running out, the customer says "Always happens when I'm in here." Odd... you don't look familiar!

"Are these free?" indicting lollipops or worse, charity pins or badges. Er... no.

The uproar when I couldn't sell anyone two packets of paracetamol in any one transaction for 'safety reasons' and also the fact we didn't have a pharmacy licence. "So there's nothing to stop me queuing up again and buying two more?" Er no, but if you're getting that many headaches, see a doctor.

Customers complaining about Christmas stock being out earlier November. By this time we were sick to death of it as it had been in store since september.

And many many more examples I can't think of at the moment.

Oh, and one of a stupid supervisor who called me in half an hour early one day as the computers weren't working in the office and nothing would power up. I arrived and switched it on at the wall for her.

Some customers are just stupid, this is some of the shit I've had and it's only recent

-Customers who give you a £20 note when buying something thats only £2, but then after you've hit the £20 button they actually have the fucking money.

-Customers who can't take hints, last week we had 2 people who came in after we had closed, with signs all over the place saying closed and the red barrier covering the entrance, meaning we're closed. Two girls came in and asked if they could get a drink, even though we closed 20 minutes earlier and all of the bleeding drinks machines were off.

-When they also take far too many mini Ketchup's and milks that they never use, the shit thing we're always refilling them every five minutes because of these pricks!

One my friend told me was a woman came into the shop and asked for a refund of her lottery ticket from the draw that had happened as she won nothing, to prove how stupid some people can be.

The moment that really sticks in my head was when I had been out on a heavy night drinking the night before, and my tongue had not completely engaged itself with brain the following day at work.

A gentleman approached me to ask if we sold a particular item. We didn't, but I intended to point out we sold something similar.

"We do smell..." I said, failing to get any other words, let alone a correction out. After an eternity I was able to correct myself, before the gentleman, smiling politely, slowly exited the shop.

I work at 118 118 at the moment, and some customers are total morons.

Me Welcome to 118 118 How may I help you?
Can I have the number for my mate please?
Yes, certainly, what's his name?
Dave
Do you have his surname?
No, but he lives in Warrington.
I'm sorry, I would need a surname to find his number.
You lot are fucking useless, can I have a refund?
No, you are charged automatically by your telephone provider
But you haven't found my number
Because you haven't given me any details
Fuck off! Bring back 192. Twats!
<Line goes dead>


I will find some more genuine call transcripts, some of them are beyond belief.