Metropol

Warburton's medium is £1.09 today in Scotmid, and I've just done the unthinkable - bought eggs from caged hens. They are less than half the price of free-range I usually buy and they are delicious.

I'm sorry for their treatment, but today I'm eating cheap eggs and I'm loving it. I can't tell the difference by taste and, besides, I'm deeply, deeply cruel

Me too. I feel slight pride.

I wonder if squeezing hens periodically makes them more productive.

Or would that just produce longer thinner eggs?

That is exactly why I hate animal rights protesters. We need answers to the important questions like this one!

Rights shmights. I want tubular eggs.

I normally get my eggs from someone who has free range chooks in the village. They are so free range you sometimes get a good roadkill hen for sunday lunch. I have bought caged hen eggs before but personally i find the eggs to be smaller and less tasty but when you want an egg for brekkie any egg will do.

I am fortunate in that I don't like eggs; however I am curious as to the benefit of a tubular egg. Despite sounding like a Mike Oldfield-when-he's-too-stoned-to-care concept album, just how would you eat it and how thin would you have to slice your soldiers?

Think of the ease of slicing!

Gavin Scott wrote:Rights shmights. I want tubular eggs.

No problem!

Oh no. Then we'll have the Orchestral Tubular Eggs, Tubular Eggs II, Tubular Eggs III, The Millennium Egg and of course, Amar-egg.

Yes, well what is the difference between an egg and a bell?

(I'm sure there's an obscene joke in there somewhere...)