Help me!

[Lorns]

Please help me fix my pootah speakers.

They were working fine last week. I let a moron loose on my laptop and now they're broked.

Done a system restore and tried all sorts of other audio stuff but i think they're proper broked. Got to use my normal stereo and my neighbours are gonna get well pissed with me tonight and i think i'm gonna cry.

One of you smatasses must know what i can do to fix 'em

[cwathen]

Obvious suggestion first (awaits slap acros the face at the audicity of suggesting that you haven't allready tried this) - but is the volume control turned up? Actually double click on the speaker icon to open the mixer and make sure that the 'Wave' control is turned up as well as the usual master volume that the laptops buttons will control.

Secondly, make sure no one has twatted about with your output devices - go to Start > Control Panel > Sounds and Audio then click on the 'audio' tab then check the setting for 'default device' under 'sound playback'. It should be something like 'AC97 Audio', 'Soundmax Digital Audio', 'Crystal Audio' or some other output with a brand. If it's 'Microsoft' this or 'USB' anything else, then the output device is wrong and needs to be changed back.

Thirdly, pop down the off-ey and buy some cheap wine. After a couple of bottles, you won't notice the music isn't coming out when singing along anyway!

[Anonymous]

Do you know what make and model of laptop you have? If - as I suspect - the drivers are all to cock then we can direct you to a site to download the drivers from.

[Lorns]

Problem solved. I've made a few phone calls and invited the neighbours to mine tonight. The pizzas are on their way. Also managed to get a few pals to pop into offie and buy a couple of KFC Bargain buckets.
Everyones happy for now.

I'll try your route to fixing them tomorrow sometime.

Cheers ears!

[Jovis]

I knew when I saw the topic title that it would be about you and your flippin computer!

[Anonymous]

Not PC literate then?

[Bitter Shandy]

Obvious suggestion first (awaits slap acros the face at the audicity of suggesting that you haven't allready tried this) - but is the volume control turned up? Actually double click on the speaker icon to open the mixer and make sure that the 'Wave' control is turned up as well as the usual master volume that the laptops buttons will control.

Secondly, make sure no one has twatted about with your output devices - go to Start > Control Panel > Sounds and Audio then click on the 'audio' tab then check the setting for 'default device' under 'sound playback'. It should be something like 'AC97 Audio', 'Soundmax Digital Audio', 'Crystal Audio' or some other output with a brand. If it's 'Microsoft' this or 'USB' anything else, then the output device is wrong and needs to be changed back.

Thirdly, pop down the off-ey and buy some cheap wine. After a couple of bottles, you won't notice the music isn't coming out when singing along anyway!

Don't slap your face too hard. She's a dumb bitch. Her nephew is going to be in so much trouble. He set it to mute.

[Jovis]

Not PC literate then?

Who me?

[Bail]

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

[Stuart*]

Thirdly, pop down the off-ey and buy some cheap wine. After a couple of bottles, you won't notice the music isn't coming out when singing along anyway!

A bottle, a bottle ?????

Lorna has her wine delivered by road haulage tankers on a weekly basis; although she reliably informed me on MSN on Friday that she was on the voddy, which probably comes via a similar delivery system through TNT's bulk-shipping division.

[Nick Harvey]

Lorna has her wine delivered by road haulage tankers on a weekly basis.

Yes, she's a real bloomin' lightweight.

At least I have daily deliveries.

Bottoms up!