Disaster

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iSon
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Joined: Fri 15 Aug, 2003 23.24
Location: London

My mate says he loves me, I've tried and failed to meet someone twice...who keeps cancelling on me for no other reason that he's a TIMEWASTER.

I'm not going to my usual quiz of the week because my mate will be there and I don't want to face him. It's not right.

And on top of all that, I'm trying to support my chronically depressed brother who has just spilt up with his girlfriend..who happens to work in the same office that me and him work. He ended it, but its not gone well.

Still, there's always someone worse off eh? :shock: :cry:
Good Lord!
cat
Posts: 513
Joined: Fri 15 Aug, 2003 13.48
Location: The Magic Faraway Tree

I want to love the person I am seeing at the moment, but I can't do it.

I'm really trying, and sometimes I think I'm almost there... but then it all falls down again.

Don't bother with love, Ison. Total waste of time.
cat
Posts: 513
Joined: Fri 15 Aug, 2003 13.48
Location: The Magic Faraway Tree

Oh, and last night I had an allergic reaction to something in a moisturiser that I bought.

I look like I've just spent a week in the Sahara.

So, I'm worse off.

And I'm left handed.
rts
Posts: 1637
Joined: Fri 15 Aug, 2003 14.09

c@t wrote:And I'm left handed.
For writing?

And James, it's always crap when a myriad of dilemmas arrive on your doorstep at once. Deal with one at a time, at your own pace, remembering that you have a responsibility to take care of yourself as well as others. I'm sure you'll get through this.

Just think of Tom looking like a beatroot if you need a smile on your face. I'm sure he won't mind.
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iSon
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I'm finding it hard to get a smile on my face at the moment. In all honesty. I can "smile for the cameras" but I'm really not happy.

Everything is just so shit, it really is. Sometimes I wonder why I bother getting out of bed in the morning. It's just all a load of wank. I can't really put down here how unhappy I am.

Fuck.
Good Lord!
rts
Posts: 1637
Joined: Fri 15 Aug, 2003 14.09

Cut back on non-essential additional activities you do. You may subconsciously be involving yourself in extra entertainment and such like, to take your mind of the real issues in your life. But by doing so you are making it very hard to identify areas of stress/discomfort/irritation/depression.

The hardest thing is always confronting, and dealing with these areas, but once you ride through, a slow process sometimes I admit, you will find other little nit-bits of stress etc can be dealt with immediately and at ease. Don't be ashamed of admitting these to yourself - it's the only way you can deal with them, learn, and progress, rather than remaining encased in a vicious cycle of destruction.

You have to break free, James! It is very easy for me to say this, and very hard for you to act out. But you have got to identify all the issues which are causing your current problems allowing you to deal with them, something equally challenging, but a positive step.

So take a step back from your life, be selfish for a bit and really focus on what is exactly that's causing you to be in your current frame of mind, speak to a friend about them, write them down, but sort them out before you do anything else "to take your mind off things".

I have every confidence that you can break through this.
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iSon
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rts wrote:Cut back on non-essential additional activities you do. You may subconsciously be involving yourself in extra entertainment and such like, to take your mind of the real issues in your life. But by doing so you are making it very hard to identify areas of stress/discomfort/irritation/depression.
I have not done anything in the last week apart from work.
rts wrote:The hardest thing is always confronting, and dealing with these areas, but once you ride through, a slow process sometimes I admit, you will find other little nit-bits of stress etc can be dealt with immediately and at ease. Don't be ashamed of admitting these to yourself - it's the only way you can deal with them, learn, and progress, rather than remaining encased in a vicious cycle of destruction.
Yes I know I have problems, ergo why I'm unhappy. Goes without saying really doesn't it?
rts wrote:You have to break free, James! It is very easy for me to say this, and very hard for you to act out. But you have got to identify all the issues which are causing your current problems allowing you to deal with them, something equally challenging, but a positive step.
I thought we already identified the issues?

:arrow: Friend who I don't like claiming to love me
:arrow: Timewasting bastard
:arrow: My depressed brother
rts wrote:So take a step back from your life, be selfish for a bit and really focus on what is exactly that's causing you to be in your current frame of mind, speak to a friend about them, write them down, but sort them out before you do anything else "to take your mind off things".
Been there, done that. Why do you think I haven't spoken to this "mate" for a week now. Why do you think I'm not going to the quiz tonight? Because I'm being selfish and looking after number 1. It's not always the best way but I can't even bear to think about my "mate" at this point in time. The whole issue makes me want to slit my wrists.
rts wrote:I have every confidence that you can break through this.
I'm glad one of us does.
Good Lord!
rts
Posts: 1637
Joined: Fri 15 Aug, 2003 14.09

Isonstine wrote:I have not done anything in the last week apart from work.
Which is fine, but make sure you have allocated time to really think long and hard about things. A nice long bath or something. You may have already. I don't know. A nice long sleep always helps too. Take a morning off.
Isonstine wrote: Yes I know I have problems, ergo why I'm unhappy. Goes without saying really doesn't it?

I thought we already identified the issues?

:arrow: Friend who I don't like claiming to love me
:arrow: Timewasting bastard
:arrow: My depressed brother
Just make sure there is not something else deeper which you may not have thought about that is causing this.
Isonstine wrote:Been there, done that. Why do you think I haven't spoken to this "mate" for a week now. Why do you think I'm not going to the quiz tonight? Because I'm being selfish and looking after number 1. It's not always the best way but I can't even bear to think about my "mate" at this point in time. The whole issue makes me want to slit my wrists.
Now don't be silly. What would James Martin do without you? When I say it will take a long time for things to get completely sorted, I'm unfortunately talking months properly, not weeks. It is going to be crap while you ride through the storm, and all my cliches cannot be doing any good at all, but there is light at the end of the tunnel which will slowly start getting bigger every week.
Isonstine wrote:I'm glad one of us does.
I do. And I'm not the sympathetic sort. If I didn't think it I would let you know. You can get trhough this James. You've had a rich and colourful life and have a strong personality. You certainly have it in you, for your sake.
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tvmercia
Posts: 601
Joined: Sat 10 Jan, 2004 03.15
Location: Low Birk Hatt

strewth - stop wallowing in self pity people and think of someone else for a change! i chipped my nail today at work, i was going to grin and bear it, but i think if i mention it, it will put everyone else's trivialities into perspective.
cat
Posts: 513
Joined: Fri 15 Aug, 2003 13.48
Location: The Magic Faraway Tree

Oh go away.

I hate people who try to make people feel happy by saying "get a grip".

Wankers.

Anyway, to make things worse, my red face now has to leave the house to go to my local BP garage down the road and by some throat stuff because i'm getting a really sore throat.

Tomorrow is going to be fun.
tvmercia
Posts: 601
Joined: Sat 10 Jan, 2004 03.15
Location: Low Birk Hatt

c@t wrote:Oh go away.

I hate people who try to make people feel happy by saying "get a grip".

Wankers.

Anyway, to make things worse, my red face now has to leave the house to go to my local BP garage down the road and by some throat stuff because i'm getting a really sore throat.

Tomorrow is going to be fun.
get a grip
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